ǝʌıʇɔǝdsɹǝd ɹnoʎ ǝƃuɐɥɔ ✡
Far away
This ship has taken me far away
Far away from the memories
Of the people who care if I live or die
Starlight
I will be chasing a starlight
Until the end of my life
I don't know if it's worth it anymore
My life
You electrify my life
Let's conspire to ignite
All the souls that would die just to feel alive
I'll never let you go
If you promise not to fade away
Never fade away
Our hopes and expectations
Black holes and revelations
Our hopes and expectations
about
Lives for: the good times, and even the bad times. Life has its up and downs but chatting it up or down, youtubing, talking on the phone 24/7, EATING, tiVOing, or just hanging in can blow all of my worries away, most of the time anyways.
loves: LATE NIGHT FREEE PHONE CALLS with the usual: therapy for the bad days and laughing all night long for the good days
THE THINGS I CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT: my bffod! MICHIGAN! south coast plaza, GTALK, AIM, Tivo, pasta at pastadena, hobos--any kind, inside jokes all the time, late night talks, early morning naps in class, song lyrics, not paying attention, BLAZERS, winding roads, picturesque scenes, fresh and easy, corner bakery cafe!, coffee brea, starbucks, ted baker, anthropologie, j. crew, madewell, CHOCOLATE CHOCOLATE, CHOCOALTE COVERED ALMONDS, pink paper, green paper, magnolia blossom shower gel, hand crafted cards, homemade chocolate chip cookies!, the o.c., ORANGE COUNTY OVER LA COUNTY!, CANADA! big text messaging!
1.31.2007, 10:37 PM
I think we can't go around measuring our goodness
by what we don't do; by what we deny ourselves, what we resist & who we exclude. I think we've got to measure goodness by what we embrace,
what we create & who we include.
Tomorrow marks the start of another month, inching towards grad day. ):
1.30.2007, 11:05 PM
Get over yourself and your pathetic life.
, 7:56 PM
"Love, she believed, should arrive all at oncewith thunder and lightening. A whirlwind fromthe skies that affects life, turns it every which way, wrestles resolutions away like leaves, and plunges the entire heart into the abyss."
-Gustave Flubert
1.29.2007, 10:59 PM
We all know that our time in this world is limited, and that eventually all of us will end up underneath some sheet, never to wake up. And yet it is always a surprise when it happens to someone we know. It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try and readjust the way you thought of things. - Lemony Snicket
1.28.2007, 10:18 PM
Rock bottom is good solid ground; & a dead end street is just a place to turn around
1.27.2007, 7:10 PM
100th post. ;)
Ranting- By definition, ranting usually isn't a great thing to do. In reality, yeah I guess it is. But just know, only rant to ranters. They understand.
Romance flicks are the movies I watch these days. The most touching films yet, that have cost me a tissue box. Okay, not really. But it brings tears to my eyes.
What you feel only matters to you.
It's what you do to the people you love.
That's what matters.
That's the only thing that counts.
--The Last Kiss
Not really out of curiosity, more like out of the random: Why is the world full of "YOU? (2nd) or 'ME' (1st person)" Ever think about the other billion people in the world, animals excluded? No, you do not. Because you think the world revolves around you, you arrogant piece of .
1.24.2007, 2:56 PM
Journalling beats doing anything else. Really, but I've been wondering. Yeah, I've been doing that a lot lately. Why do I journal about nothing but life? Am I so insecure that I feel that someone might read my thoughts, and then judge me? Am I so afraid of what people think of me? Yeah, I think I do. But I've always been taught that it doesn't matter what people think of you. Hey, but this world. this society. Just JUDGES, never understands so what are you supposed to do to stay um. alive?
Lately, I've been thinking about so many things, I can't even put them together, I can't list them or anything. At one moment, I may feel like something, and another I press this other issue on me. And now, I think I can't write--or type details. Again, afraid someone might read this. If there is one thing I've learned from wondering is that never refer to anyone on the Internet. Yeah, swear it all out, but don't write any names. Lol.
If I could use all my life wondering, I would. But then I'd wonder, what am I doing, wasting alll this time, doing absolutely fucking nothing. But then, wondering isn't exactly nothing. Is it? Priorities, anyone?
Sometimes things just aren't meant to be, and that has to be okay. It has to be okay, because otherwise, what do we have?
1.22.2007, 5:27 PM
This weekend has been busy mixed with heartbreak. And it's not the love kind of heartbreak. Yes, it's true, I want it to stay as it is. I mean, rehearsals for orch take up a lot of time, but the music we make, the fun, just makes it so hard to leave. But in the end, I am glad that I was honored the experience of performing with the All Southern Orch. '07.
Only one person in a thousand knows the trick of really living in the present..most of us spend 59 minutes an hour living in the past, with regret for lost joys or shame for things badly done.. both utterly useless & weakening..or in a future which we either long for, or dread..there is only one minute in which you're alive, this minute, here & now. the only way to live is by accepting each minute as an unrepeatable minute, which is exactly what it is..
1.20.2007, 10:44 PM
If you must lose faith in everything, don't lose faith in love.
1.18.2007, 7:16 PM
A wise man once said 'you can have anything in life if you're willing to sacrifice everything else for it.' What he meant is, nothing comes without a price. so before you go into battle, you better decide how much you're willing to lose. Too often, going after what feels good means, letting go of what you know is right, and letting someone in means abandoning the walls you've spent a lifetime building. of course, the toughest sacrifices are the ones we don't see coming, when we don't have time to come up with a strategy to pick a side or to measure the potential loss. When that happens, when the battle chooses us and not the other way around, that's when the sacrifice can turn out to be more than we can bear. - Grey's Anatomy
1.17.2007, 6:25 PM
It seems only the old are able to sit next to each other & not say anything & still feel content. The young, brash, & impatient must always break the silence. It’s a waste, for silence is pure. Silence is holy. It draws people together cause only those who are comfortable with each other can sit without speaking.
This is a great paradox.
+The Notebook
1.16.2007, 5:37 PM
"Every heart sings a song incomplete until
a n o t h e r h e a r t w h i s p e r s b a c k .
Those who wish to sing always find a song.
At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet."
++Plato
So today was a total, complete waste of time. Just go to school to turn in assignments, and in return receiving more. Tests to study for. The one good point: 95 On Geometry retest. Probably saved me, hopefully Honor Roll. But think, If we didnt have school, we could probably use our time studying ..or not. I pick "not." It's the way of procrastination. End of semester's coming up.
The OC is coming to an end too. So is everything coming to an end?
1.15.2007, 8:06 AM
"I'm not going anywhere. This is it for me. You're it for me. & I can't pretend to feel any less than I do. I'm sorry. I can't." --Gilmore Girls
I’m at that point in my life where things are neither good nor bad. They could be better, but they could be worse and I can't look at anything with a purely pessimistic or optimistic point of view. It’s that point in life where you just have to forge forward and hope for the best. You keep your fingers crossed in hopes of someday catching that happiness you tried so hard to hold in your grasp. That’s the thing about happiness, it is fleeting. Like that firefly you try to capture and no matter how many times you waver, try to clasp it in your hands, but it never wants to be kept. Keep one foot in front of the other and move along, because someday that firefly will find its way to you.
1.14.2007, 1:45 PM
It's been so long.
I have changed. You have changed.
But when I see you, all I can see is that adorable little face & those sparkling eyes of yours, & it just drives me crazy all over again. & one thing I know hasn't changed is how much I like you, & yes..you haven't changed either for there was never a space in your heart for me.
There never was, never is, & never will be
1.13.2007, 8:17 PM
If we discovered that we had only five minutes left to say what we wanted to say, every telephone booth, every cell phone would be occupied by people calling others to stammer that they loved them.
1.12.2007, 3:47 PM
The important thing is not to be bitter over life's disappointments. Learn to let go of the past, and recognize that every day won't be sunny. And when you find yourself lost in the darkness of despair, remember, it's only in the black of night that you see the stars, and those stars lead you back home.
1.11.2007, 2:56 PM
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? a death. What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. you should die first, get it out of the way. then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young. You get a gold watch and you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy retirement. you drink, you party, you get ready for highschool. You go to elementary school; you become a kid, you play and have no responsibilities. You become a baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating, then you finish off as an orgasm.
1.10.2007, 7:03 PM
The days go by, the nights don't change.
The stars still spell out your name.
I will wait for you.
The world has let me down,
or is it that you're still not around?
1.09.2007, 11:02 PM
You know what? Tragedies happen. What are you gonna do? Give up? Quit? No. I realize now that when your heart breaks,you got to fight like hell to make sure you'restill alive. Cause you are, and that pain you feel, it's life. The confusion and fear, that'sthere to remind you that somewhere outthere is something better, and that something is worth fighting for.
1.08.2007, 10:36 PM
Just say what you mean, and mean what you say. Don't expect someone to read your mind, and don't play games with heads or hearts. Don't tell half truths, and expect trust when the full truth comes out. Half truths are no better than lies. Don't be cold to someone you care about, indifference hurts more than angry words.
And I think we're all destined to some kind of unpredictable fate.
1.07.2007, 4:00 PM
85th post. :O Shows how bored i am? Or maybe how inspired i am.. What do you think?
If you're feeling frightened about what comes next, don't. Embrace the uncertainty. Allow it to lead you places. Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart & your mind as you create your own path towards happiness, don't waste time with regret. Spin wildly into your next action. Enjoy the present, each moment, as it comes ; 'cause you'll never get another one quite like it. & if you should ever look up, & find yourself lost, simply take a breath & start over. Retrace your steps & go back to the purest place in your heart..where your hope lives. You'll find your way again.
1.06.2007, 9:42 PM
Sometimes in life, you run across a love unknown.
Without a reason,it feels like you belong.
Hold on dear life.
Don't go off running from what's new.
.I became somebody through loving you
1.05.2007, 10:41 AM
candycrazedbunny: What does Bella Swan do when true love leaves her? Not just true love, but Edward Cullen! None of those other heroines lost an Edward (Romeo was a hothead, Willoughby was a scoundrel, Tristan had loyalty issues, Heathcliff was pure evil, Rhett had a mean streak and cheated with hookers, and sweet Gilbert was much more of a Jacob than an Edward). So what happens when True Love in the form of Edward Cullen leaves Bella?
candycrazedbunny: this is what the author wrote.candycrazedbunny: pompous bullshit is what it is. Romeo, Willoughby, Tristan, Heathcliff, Rhett, and Gilbert had FLAWS. Edward does NOT, you stupid ignoramus. Clearly you missed the big fat #1 of writing. Give your characters FUCKING FLAWS.
mich ellex 0xlin: twilight again, huh?
candycrazedbunny: ...mebbe
candycrazedbunny: it's just like an exhaustless supply of stupidity!!!
mich ellex 0xlin: just face it, stephanie meyer has problems
candycrazedbunny: yes.c
andycrazedbunny: i just can't resist...
candycrazedbunny: sporking it.
1.04.2007, 10:12 PM
Here's the day you hoped would never come
Don’t feed me violence, just run with me
Through rows of speeding cars
The paper cuts, the cheating lovers
The coffee’s never strong enough
I know you think it’s more than just bad luck
There, there, baby
It’s just text book stuff
It’s in the ABC of growing up
Now, now, darlin’
Oh don’t lose your head'
Cause none of us were angels
And you know I love you, yeah
Sleeping pills, no sleeping dogs lie never
Far enough away
Glistening in the cold sweat of guilt
I’ve watched you slowly winding down for years
You can’t keep on like this
Now is as bad of time as any
There, there, baby
It’s just text book stuff
It’s in the ABC of growing up
1.03.2007, 6:37 PM
"I think you can't wait for someone to fly underneath you & save your life..
I think you have to save yourself." - Grey's Anatomy.
There comes a time when every life goes off course. In this desperate moment, you must choose your direction. Will you fight to stay on the path? Will others tell you who you are or will you label yourself? Will you be haunted by your choice or will you embrace your new path? Each morning you choose to move forward or to simply give up..
And you know what?
Some people can't handle the excruciating pain of life anymore, & they create their own type of reality. We call this insanity. but maybe..maybe insanity is just a less painful version of reality.
1.01.2007, 11:07 PM
candycrazedbunny: "why do you read books that you hate so much?" idiot cousin that bought new moon
candycrazedbunny: "Because i like to laugh on the inside. Sick. Fun."
